Friday, July 12, 2013

Remember what you say to your children is important!

What your children hear from you...

Your children, no matter how young, are very intuitive.  They can sense what is going on.  They pick up your body language.

You need to learn how to co-parent in a positive, effective way for their sake.

Keep the children out of what I call "adult business".  I don't care if your children are 3, 13, 23, or 33.

Certain topics should always be "off limits" -- such as if their parent had an affair -- they truly don't need to know that tidbit of information -- how does that information help them?  It does not -- it is just cruel on your part to tell them that their other parent had "affairs".

Remember the tv show "Get Smart" - keep your children under a "cone of silence".
Both of you should keep certain negative topics - off limits - no one should discuss certain negative topics with them - ever - no matter how old they are!

Remember, your child is 50% of both you.

You picked the other person to be the child's parent -- so if you talk bad about the other parent it also reflects badly on you.

For example, if the mom is a "slut" then you must really "dumb" if you selected her to marry!  You are showing your child that your child is 50% slut & 50% dumb! I'm sure that is not the intention that you were actually planning to convey to your child!  Then you wonder why your child begins to act out and starts running the streets & doing drugs! You've told them that they are worthless -- so be careful what you say and the tone of your voice.

How you treat the other parent is going to teach them how they treat other people in the future.

Remember, you get more flies with honey than with vinegar.

If you treat the other parent with common courtesy like you would any stranger on the street, how does that hurt you.  There is no reason not to use words like "please" and "thank you".

You are teaching your child how to treat their future boyfriend/girl-friend in the future.  I'm sure that you want them to pick someone top-notch in the future.  You don't want them picking someone that will treat them badly - so teach them even when they are very small to treat everyone with respect and to treat themselves with respect.

Your children watch you and think that you know everything when they are little.  You are their teachers.  You are their world.  Teach them from the beginning how to respect themselves and everyone around them.  That includes their other parent...even if you don't like the other parent.

You will be blessed when your child grows up with a healthy, happy child that is well adjusted.

That is truly the greatest blessing.




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