Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Adult Adoptee Info - as of May 2016

Read my blog post of 9/2/2013 for more adult adoptee information!

Go to bottom of this page to see a bunch of websites to begin your search...

I opened my own adoption records over 13 years ago when my oncologist insisted I get my medical history when I learned I had breast cancer.

I have moved and I cannot find my file on everything I did - I keep hoping it will turn up but it's been 2 years and still missing - very frustrating!

If you were born in Texas, go the to State of Texas Department of State Health Services on-line. You can order a non-certified copy of your original birth certificate for around $10.

You can also call the Texas Department of State Health Services - they were very nice to me.

There was an adult adoptee location service that I used. Unfortunately, it did not connect me with my half-sister that was looking for me -- we were very close but both of us had some incorrect info so the agency did not match us.

There are many adult adoptee sites on the internet.  Some people have learned ways to find out info or people that will amaze you.

You can hire a skip-trace person to help you find "missing" people. If you find one with a lot of experience they won't tell you how they do it but they can find people -- even ones that are trying to hide. With the internet today it's hard to go off the radar.

Don't expect a lot of info in your adoption file. My file was very thin and did not contain a lot of information. Also, my birth parents lied a lot -- so a lot of the info was wrong! The man listed as bio dad was not bio dad -- so be prepared for anything!

I hope this information is helpful.

Be aware that some Texas judges will not open your sealed adoption file.

If you were adopted through an agency, there is a website to contact - even if the agency has gone out of business.

Being an adult adoptee is a journey filled with many twists and turns.  I encourage you to talk to people that have been in your shoes. Just because it worked for me does not mean that what I did will work for you - be creative and patient.  Good luck on your journey!






I "googled" Texas Adult Adoptee and here is what I found:

Warning: I have no idea who these groups are & have not visited every site listed. 

You need to try different search engines (yahoo, bing, google, etc. because each might be different.)

But I receive at least 2 calls a month from people just beginning their journey and this will be a good place to begin your searches.










  1. Adoption and Adult Adoptee Information - Texas Department ...

    https://www.dshs.state.tx.us/.../...

    Texas Department of State Health Services
    Oct 8, 2013 - General Information about adoption in Texas. ... processing time. Adult Adoptee Application for Non-Certified Copy of Original Birth Certificate.
  2. The Adoption Revolution Led by Adoptees Searching on the ...

    www.openadoption.org/bbetzen/adoptee.htm
    Here in Texas we have the Texas Coalition for Adoption Resources and Education ... Our first goal is to give adult adoptees a legal right to have a copy of their ...
  3. Resources for Adult Adoptees | Adoptionsbygladney

    adoptionsbygladney.com/.../resources-...

    The Gladney Center for Adoption
    Sep 24, 2011 - ... Your Page Too. On this page you will find resources of interest toadult adoptees: ... 6300 John Ryan Drive | Fort Worth, Texas 76132-4122.


  4. www.texaslawhelp.org is a free site & it contains lots of Texas legal information.
  5. I recommend this site. 


  6. Adult Adoptees | Texas Free Legal Forms, Law, Pro Bono ...

    texaslawhelp.org/resource/adult-adoptees?ref=3Q0Xa

    Adult Adoptees who were born in Texas can click on this link to the Texas Department of State Health Services to request a copy of their original birth certificate.
  7. Adoptees Meetups - Meetup
  8. adoptees.meetup.com/

    This group is open to all members of the adoption triad...adult adoptees, adoptive ... Welcome to the Texas Adoption Reunion and Support Group of Houston!
  9. STAR | Support Texas Adoptee Rights | Working to Restore ...

    www.texasadopteerights.org/

    We support legislation restoring to adult adoptees born in Texas, full access to their first medical record; their original, factual and unaltered certificates of birth.
  10. AAAFC A site by adoptees, for adoptees.

    www.adultadoptees.org/

    Feb 9, 2015 - Is this why it's often so hard for reunions to work for both sides with us caught in the middle even as adults? Because the arents are given first ...
  11. Adult Adoptees in Texas - Opening Adoption Records - Fran ...

    houstonmediator.blogspot.com/.../adult-adoptees-in-texas-opening.html

    Sep 2, 2013 - Adult Adoptees in Texas - Opening Adoption Records. Update January, 2015: A couple of people have emailed me that the suggestions I made ...
  12. Adoption group supports bill to access original birth certificates

    kxan.com/.../adoption-group-pushing-for-access-to-original-...

    KXAN‑TV
    Jan 19, 2015 - He is part of the nonprofit Adoption Knowledge Affiliates, which supportsadult adoptees from Texas to be able to easily get their hands on ...
  13. Adoptee Rights | Facebook

    https://www.facebook.com/AdopteeRightsCoalition
    Support Texas Adoptee Rights STAR is heading to the capitol today for .... 352, which if passed would give adult adoptees from Indiana's “closed records” period ...
  14. Forum | AAAFC

    adultadoptees.org/index.html/?page_id=23

    Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change is an adoptee-centered support forum. This forum was created by adoptees, and is owned, administered and moderated ...
  15. Forum - AAAFC

    www.adultadoptees.org/forum/

    Adult Adoptees.Org is an adoptee-centric support forum. We strive to meet the needs of the adoptee first with support, understanding, friendship and more than a ...
  16. AAAFC A site by adoptees, for adoptees.

    www.adultadoptees.org/

    Feb 9, 2015 - Once we are adults, it seems so wrong to still have to carry the original ..... to join the forum so that she could hopefully help her adopted son to ...
  17. Adult Adoptees - Adoption.com Forums

    forums.adoption.com/adult-adoptees/

    Adult Adoptees - Find support and encouragement for issues concerning adult adoptees.
  18. Adoptee Support - Adoption.com Forums

    forums.adoption.com/adoptee-support/
    ... Needs & Attachment Forums · Search & Reunion Forums · Adult Adoptees Forums· Birth Parents Forums ... Threads in Forum : Adoptee Support, Forum Tools ...
  19. Adoption family tree search. Adopted? Find birth parents.

    adoption.com/adoptee

    I'm an adoptee searching for a birth family member. ... FORUMS ... I am an adult adoptee, aged 55, who found my birth family 5 years ago, unfortunately too late ...
  20. POSITIVE Adult Adoptee Support (birth, options, parents, stories ...

    www.city-data.com › ... › General Forums › Parenting › Adoption
    Oct 6, 2012 - 10 posts - ‎8 authors
    Any adult adoptees who feel their lives have been positively influenced by adoption please post your stories here. Adoption can be a Blessing.
  21. I Was Adopted | Group with Personal Stories, Forums and ...

    www.experienceproject.com/groups/Was-Adopted/173

    Were You Adopted? Join 3403 friendly people sharing 736 true stories in the I WasAdopted group. Find forums, advice and chat with groups who share this life ...
  22. [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum: When an adoptee says: I'm not ...

    www.firstmotherforum.com/.../when-adoptee-says-im-not-interested-in.h...

    Feb 26, 2014 - As late as 1960, some forty percent of the states still had laws on the books recognizing "an unrestricted right of adult adoptees to inspect their ...
  23. AAAFC A site by adoptees, for adoptees.

    www.adultadoptees.org/

    Feb 9, 2015 - Once we are adults, it seems so wrong to still have to carry the original lie around if .... The first hit on a Google search for adoptee support is often ... how lucky and grateful they were, like it was part of the culture of the group.
  24. Adult Adoptees Resources - Band Back Together

    www.bandbacktogether.com/adult-adoptees-resources/

    Joining Support Groups - local, national and international support groups exist foradult adoptees everywhere. These support groups are a wonderful place to ...
  25. Adult Adoptees « Center for Adoption Support and Education

    adoptionsupport.or...

    Center for Adoption Support and Education C.A.S.E.
    Adult Adoptees. In the adoption community, we say “Adoption is a lifelong journey.” Being adopted can have a significant impact on a person's life at any age.
  26. 10 Things Adoptees Want You to Know | Lesli Johnson

    www.huffingtonpost.com/.../adoption_b_2161590.h...

    The Huffington Post
    Jan 11, 2013 - Only eight states in the U.S. allow adult adoptees access to their ... can find connection through support groups, interaction with other adoptees ...
  27. Services-Adoption-Post Adoption - Catholic Charities of the ...

    https://www.catholiccharities.org/services/services-adoption-post-adoption

    Adult Adoptee and Birthmother Search Services. Counseling. Birth parent support group. Search and Reunion Support Group. Adoption Day Camp (ages 6-12 ...
  28. Texas Adoption Reunion and Support of Houston ... - Meetup

    www.meetup.com/DFW-Adoption-Reunion-and-Support/.../204594072/

    Oct 11, 2014 - Welcome to the Texas Adoption Reunion and Support Group of Houston! We are a diverse group of adult adoptees, birthparents and adoptive ...
  29. Adoptees Meetups - Meetup

    adoptees.meetup.com/

    Welcome to the Texas Adoption Reunion and Support Group of Houston! We are a diverse group of adult adoptees, birthparents and adoptive parents who are ...
  30. [PDF]Support Groups - American Adoption Congress

    www.americanadoptioncongress.org/.../SUPPORT%20GROUP%20LIST...

    Apr 4, 2012 - Support Groups. 1. Last Updated on April 4, 2012. ALABAMA. Birth Parents/Adult Adoptees Group. Birmingham, AL. Audrey Derevenko, LCSW.














  31. Adoption Support Group: Young Adult Adoptees - Adoptive ...

    www.adoptivefamiliescircle.com › Groups

    Home > Groups > Young Adult Adoptees. National Adoption Directory. Find an Adoption Agency. By Country, U.S., Albania, Armenia, Austria, Azerbaijan ...

  32. This is an article from the website 
  33. www.texaslegalhelp.org
  34. look under "family" and click adoption link -- 
  35. Lots of info on this website including suggested forms!

  36. HOW TO REQUEST ADOPTION RECORDS IN TEXAS 

  37. In Texas, courts must seal adoption records. But sometimes, people can show good reasons why the records should be opened to them. Only the adopted child or an immediate relative to the adopted child can ask for access to the sealed records. The request, called an Application, should be filed with the District Clerk in the county where the adoption took place. You must sign the Application in front of a notary. Because the release of adoption information has long been considered a highly emotional issue, the Court may require you to undergo counseling before the records are released to you. Depending on circumstances in your case, the Court may order that the records be released to an Adoption Intermediary, who can pursue contact with other parties on your behalf. If the Court orders that an Intermediary be appointed in your case, you will be responsible for the Intermediary’s fees The judge will usually honor your request to have a specific counselor or intermediary appointed. It is a good idea to have discussed fees with a counselor or intermediary, and have one in mind before you go to see the judge. You will also be responsible for any fees associated with copying the sealed records in your case. When you complete your Application, be as specific as you can be in explaining why you need access to the sealed records. After you complete the Application and Order, make a copy for your records. File the original in the county where the adoption took place. Ask the clerk how to set a hearing for your Application. In some counties, you may be able to see a judge the same day you file your Application. This is not possible in all counties. When your case is called before the judge, walk up to the judge’s bench. Stand close enough for the judge to hear you. Remember not to lean against the judge’s bench. The judge will swear you in, asking you to tell the truth, and then ask you some questions about your situation. Be prepared to answer the judge in a courteous, honest, and respectful manner. After the judge has heard your testimony and reviewed your case, s/he will make a decision about whether or not you can have access to the information you requested. If the judge grants your request, and allows the information to be released directly to you, ask the District Clerk to make a certified copy of the order you have requested, along with a certified copy of the Order Regarding Access to Termination and Adoption Records. If the judge allows you to have access through an Intermediary, you will have to contact the Intermediary. You should ask the District Clerk to make a certified copy of the Order Regarding Access to Termination and Adoption Records to give to the Intermediary. You might want to make a copy for yourself, as well. The Clerk’s office usually charges a fee for certified copies. 

  38. Keep in mind, the judge might tell you s/he can’t give you access to the records. The judge has sole discretion to decide whether or not you are entitled access to the records. 




Adult Adoption Network of Texas Info as of May 2016

Update as of August, 2016 - I don't know if this info is still accurate.

Adoption Network of Texas will be closing this Meetup group, but will still remain an active organization dedicated to promoting transparency in adoption, restoring rights of adult adoptees, supporting those touched by adoption in search and reunion, and promoting legislation for adoptees to obtain their original birth certificates.

We will continue to hold monthly support group meetings on the second Saturday of each month from 10:00 am to noon at 2900 N. Braeswood, Houston, TX.  We are also available to meet individually or in a small group in between monthly group meetings if needed.  All future meeting announcements and organization updates will be made through our website and various social media sites listed below.
Website: www.adoptionnetworktexas.org


Public Facebook Page - Adoption Network of Texas (anyone can view/comment on this page):www.facebook.com/TXAdoptionNetwork


Closed Facebook Group - Adoption Network of Texas - Reunion and Support (A private group for anyone in the triad with ties to Texas.  Anything posted in this group cannot be seen by any of your friends or on your timeline.  The purpose of this closed group is support, search and reunion, and  legislative updates.)


Twitter - @AdoptionNetTX


You may also reach us directly by email at adoptionnetworktx@gmail.com
Be sure to look for our gray, blue, and black triangular logo to know you are in the right spot!
Thank you!  We look forward to seeing you!

Friday, April 8, 2016

New a tough, smart attorney for a family law case?

I can highly recommend Attorney Patricia Bushman 
at 713-807-9405.

Talk to Jessica or Victoria.

Her office is open Monday - Friday from 9-5 pm.

We have officed in the same suite over 7 years - but I have known her over 15 years.

Her first appointment is $25 and if you hire her then that money is applied to your deposit.

She is a very smart and tough attorney that loves to go to court.

She has been licensed approximately 20 years.

She has presented me and I send all my friends and family to her.

If I have a legal issue, I want Pat on my side!

Attorney for uncontested cases in the Houston area (counties like Harris & Montgomery County)

I have met Attorney Amy Fearnow and I can now recommend her if you need any uncontested paperwork prepared.

Her rates are very reasonable - starts at $1,000 plus her out-of-pocket fees (like filing fees).

She does quality work!

713-870-5551

fearnowlawfirm@gmail.com 





Please tell Amy that Fran sent you!

Thursday, November 19, 2015

2016 rates

My rates for 2016 will remain (unless something changes) at my rate for mediation will remain what it's been for the past several years:

$300 per side for 4 hours - 2 people then $600, 3 people then $900, 4 people then $1,200. This is non-negotiable. The more parties -- the more work.

If we go longer than 4 hours then it's $75 per person per hour.
The parties control the process.  At the end of 3-1/2 hours if people want to end then I can declare an impasse. If they want to continue, then I expect to be paid for my work.

No personal checks accepted.

I accept cash, debt or credit card or attorney check.

No billing - payment is due at the time the service is performed.

I expect a $150 per side non-refundable deposit per party paid at least 3 hours before the actual mediation.

Due to the no shows for pro se (no attorneys) mediations, I have been forced to require a non-refundable deposit of $300 BEFORE I will even schedule the mediation on my calendar.  (Sorry but I've been abused my no shows and I want to know that you are committed to the process.)

I do offer discounts, totally at my discretion.

Example, if a person is disabled military on limited income, on disability with no assets then I have been known to discount my rate.  No freebies. I find that people need some "skin" in the game.  During the mediation is I determine the person has financial resources then I reserve the right to eliminate my discount or terminate the mediation due to misrepresentation.

I do lots of pro bono through the Dispute Resolution Center, Lone Star Legal, Houston Volunteer Lawyers and South Texas College of Law -- I don't do involuntarily pro bono (free) work.  So don't ask.

Based on my level of experience and training my rates are way below market price. I know it.  My husband says that I'm worth much more.  So do not attempt to negotiate with me. I know the market, I know my competition and I'm really good at what I do.  If you want to negotiate or get a freebie, look elsewhere.

I have shown a commitment to keeping my prices affordable to everyone.



Contacted again to be on a pilot t.v. show


Approximately 4 hours years a production company (that actually has shows on cable t.v.) contacted me about being their "mediator" on a new tv show.  Unfortunately, they wanted a "Judge Judy" type.  I tried to explain to the gentleman that mediation is not yelling at people - it's helping people resolve their issues in creative and non-aggressive ways.
Mediation is no 5 minutes and done -- it's a slow process that often takes time and patience to fully develop. I actually made it through 3 rounds with the "producers" but they lost interest in me.  So far no "mediator" tv show has made it to my cable provider so I suspect that what the producers wanted and what competent mediators could actually produce were in conflict.

Today I received a call from another company that does similar shows. (I have actually watched several of their productions on my local Comcast cable tv). They want to do a show about teenagers and emanipation.  I told them that obviously they don't understand the Texas Family Code since emancipation of minors is extremely limited and very difficult.

I talked to a very nice gentleman for over 15 minutes and I have agreed orally to proceed with "discussions".  Since it's a national show I would not appear as an attorney and give legal advice. I would give "common sense" advice to families with teen-agers.  I suspect these families would be in "crisis".  We are going to "skype" soon -- he promised me that he could help me "skype" since the last time I tried "skype" it did not work.  I prefer Facetime.

After being a lawyer almost 25 years - 5 of which were at Houston Volunteer Lawyers where I handled anything that walked in the door - I feel, at my age and on my third marriage, being a parent and, briefly, a step-parent,  that I can easily give people advice! As I always say on my free phone consults -- my opinion is worth what you pay me.

Of course, if they don't like me I highly recommended Attorney Rose Cardenas.  She is often interviewed for Spanish speaking tv (not just in Houston) and she is the "queen of sound bites".  I've watched a couple of her interviews and she "nails" it every time.

Maybe Rose and I should be the dynamic duo!


Wednesday, November 18, 2015

2015 Top Houston Family Law Attorneys by Houstonia Magazine


Here is the list of attorneys listed by Houstonia Magazine as a "top family law attorney" in Houston:

Benee Bellue

Paul Calzada

Lennea Cannon

Shannon Cavers

Thomas Conner

Laura Dale

Holly Davis

Cynthia Diggs

Judy Dougherty

Thea Fabio

James Gilbreath

Shari Goldberry

Daniel Gray

Liza Greene

Erin Groce

Hal Hale

Debra Herndon

Michael Hiller

Reginald Hirsch

Joseph Indelicato

Denise Khoury

Lacy LaFour

Diana Larson

Erik Larson

Allecia Lindsey-Pottinger

Luis Midence

William Moore

Susan Myres

Stephanie Proffitt

Mary Quinn

Mary Ramos

Judy Ritts

Leonard Roth

Donald Royall

Barbara Lynn Schnack - no longer takes private cases - works for Harris County DRO

Lindsey Short

Matthew Skillern

Christopher & Spofford

Angela Stout

Harry Tindall

Norma Trusch

Hilary Unger

K Nicole Voyles

Laurden Waddell

Brian Walters

Sam "Trey" Yates

Most I know & many of them I've mediated with -- a few I do not personally know. 

When hiring an attorney you need to be aware that the Harris County Family Lawyers group is a tight-knit "family".  We might be on opposite sides, but if someone has a problem or issue, the other family law attorneys will always work together to handle the matter in a professional and ethical manner. In Texas, attorneys are held to a professional code of conduct and all judges expect us to follow it.  

If you need a family law attorney, check on www.avvo.com, look on the State Bar of Texas website to see if your attorney has any discipline issues with the State Bar and visit their websites.  Also, check with friends and family on who they used and liked.  

Be aware that Texas law is changed by the Texas legislature every 2 years and what happened in your friend's case 10 years ago might not happen today.  So hire someone that goes to court often, knows all the judges and their personalities and is reasonably priced.  Family law is expensive and can run into thousands of dollars.

What no one tells you is that over 90% of all cases settle at or before mediation since most people cannot afford to go to trial.  If you want a trial anticipate $15,000 minimum and more if you want a jury trial.  Plus, judges dislike jury trials because they back up their docket so they will put you off until their calendar is clear - could be over a year to get a first trial date with a jury trial.  

Many judges now require mediation prior to even setting temporary orders and definitely before trial.  I often mediate a case 2-3 times before a trial setting.  I don't settle them all but I save folks a ton of money and a lot of time.  Always consider mediation before litigation.  

How much does a case cost? At $350 


2015 Houston Magazine lists top Houston mediators

Here is the list of mediators listed as "Top Houston Mediators" by Houstonia Magazine:

Jeffry Abrams

Ron Bankston

W. Robins Brice

Fran Brochstein - me!!

Sherri Cothrun

Tammy Manning

Michael Wilk

That's 7 out of the hundreds of mediators that live in Houston!

Plus, I did not pay any money for this endorsement.

I am proud to be included on this short list of mediators that I know & respect.

Thanks Houstonia Magazine - my 3rd year in a row being listed on their attorney lists!